Yes, dear readers. I forgot about this series last month but fear not! For it is here in all its glory, so please allow me to put the riot gear away and take the pitchforks back home with you. Much thanks! And now, some recent less-focused-on bizzare and random stories that have popped up around the news wires and Internet.

* - Today's lesson: if for some bizarre reason you lose your male reproductive organ, it may not be a good idea to have it replaced via transplant. A man in China went through the operation last month in hopes that he would be functional once again but it ended up causing serious psychological damage to him and his wife. The transplanted organ was removed two weeks later.

* - Early last month, folks at Google announced that the ever-expanding search engine would offer a news archive that goes back 300 years. The plan is to have the service offered to the public for free. Yeah, we'll see how long that pipe dream lasts.

* - Point of advice to media people out there: if you are going to write about Barry Bonds' alleged steroid use, make sure you are willing to reveal your sources. Two San Francisco Chronicle writers were shipped off to prison late last month after refusing to reveal the BALCO grand jury sources they had used in their research.

* - Actress Elizabeth Hurley went on auction eBay late last month for a starting bid of 1,500 English pounds... er, scratch that. A replica, the fembot replica of the actress used in the Austin Powers series, was actually the item up for bid. It's probably the best any person could get to having their actress/actor of their dreams under their roof.

* - We all knew former President Bill Clinton had a thing for interns but 40-year-old has-been actresses? Apparently the former Democratic occupant of the White House was so busy eyeing Demi Moore at an event early this month that he never acknowledged her husband, Ashton Kutcher, who was sitting right next to her. "I was like the guy that wasn't there," Kutcher said.

* - ESPN's Jeff Brantley from the show "Baseball Tonight" is quite the prophet. According to Brantley, "The only way to beat the Yankees is to outscore them." Yeah. I think FireJoeMorgan stated it best when it said: "Other options: 1. Kidnap their players, causing forfeit; 2. Tell them game is happening in Baltimore when it's really happening in Seattle, causing forfeit [and] 3. Ask them politely to forfeit, causing forfeit."

* - Here's a thought. The next time you play a friend in NCAA Football or Madden and lose, go grab a knife and stab the guy. Well, that's the advice you would get from a Tennessee man who took a 10 to 12 inch long knife and plunged it deep into the back of his opponent's back after losing to the stabee in a Playstation-based college football game. Needless to say, the man was charged with attempted murder and being a sore loser.

* - Today's matchup with the Pittsburgh Steelers and the Kansas City Chiefs will not have Steelers guard Kendall Simmons on the field. The five-year veteran is out with frostbite after getting too much treatment for an injury to his left foot. As a result, Simmons received an ice burn and will miss at least one game for the defending Super Bowl champions.

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